Oh My God
It's crazy all the things I see that create such tension in me, are the same things that I've seen myself do onto others in the past. I have been there. I have been called "overbearing" in the past. Now I know what it feels like to receive it. I see what it feels like when someone is asking me a bunch of questions all at once, and is very much often focused on me. I would of thought it's nice when another would be focused on my wellbeing but now I see the twist I never saw before. I know see how by them constantly asking every detail of what I am doing, I actually feel suffocated, and actually incapable. I wish instead they just asked if I need assistance, period. And if I tell them no, that they trust me enough to know that I have it under control. I see how trusting someone to figure something out on their own can be so helpful. Instead we sometimes feel like we have to solve people's problems all the time. Sometimes we feel like we are the one to come up with the answers, for the other, as if we know what is best for them. No wonder some kids become so rebellious. No wonder teenagers are not honest with their parents. No wonder why most parents don't know all the things their kids do. They need space sometimes. Odviously they need to be guided when safety is an issue. But when it becomes extreme, like everyday having a parent that is opinionated about everything they do.. well that is when they may feel constantly questioned. They may feel constantly interrogated. They may feel like the parent doubts their own capability and that is why they are constantly told what to do, and how to do it.
We become like a toy, a mere machine. And within this toy, this machine, of who we are, there is a push button, and it says "this is what they think is right for me". This push button creates within us lots of "misbeliefs". As a child we may actually believe beliefs like "I don't know anything and that is why instead of giving me a chance, they are constantly telling me how to live my life". Another belief it would create in a person would possibly be "I must be stupid if they are telling me what to do all the time". Another belief would possibly be "noone listens to me, noone believes in me". Another belief may be " I am incapable".
Beliefs go on and on... They have a mind of its own. It's when we believe these misbeliefs that create in us this whirwind of delusion and tension, that takes us over. This dark cloud can take over instantaneously. It can take over unless we become conscious of it.
There comes a point in our lives when we stop blaming others for bringing out these triggers that are so painful in us. Perhaps every situation, every person in our path, every circumstance, and every every every obstacle (that which appears to be an obstacle that is) is a mere opportunity, of an evolution higher than any sense of wonder or magical dimension we could ever imagine.
Perhaps we are meant to go through all these crazy scenarios in our life to understand and through understanding we grow with wisdom and compassion to all, until all is left is unconditional love and our deep connectedness to our true essence which vibrates with such peace and bliss.
We are ready to transcend. I feel we are all transcending more and more. And in that, thanking eachother for such blessings, even when some of these blessings appear truly disguised.
