A great bond

When I was little I used to go to these expensive restaurants with my family when my aunt and uncle from Curacao where staying in their 2nd home on Manhattan. It was fancy.. their apartment, the sofas, the kitchen...

One day we went to this particular restaurant and I saw these funny fish in a tank. They were beautiful. My heart melted when our eyes connected. Then I saw the same waiter grab one of them and took him in the kitchen. I had to follow. I was a curious 10 year old, but I was also wondering about my new friend. My heart crushed and splattered as he put this delightful kind soul into a boiling tank. I heard him crying. I cried and alone I felt.. alone not knowing how to speak out or even share my pain.. my lack of understanding of why these things occured.

I only knew back then how to be a listener. Even as a little child, it was me in a world where everyone was busy, except for my barbies, in which luckily, I had to talk with. Thinking back, everyone did the best they could, and did the best they knew- and they worked two jobs to make it through.. My dad being in the Holocaust and all, had veils of suffering within any hug I don't remember.. And my mom had her sufferings as well.. Trying to gain the material wealth that in her youth she never felt. To her it was a big deal to buy us a coat, but deep down all I wanted was love.

We need to not be in order to be. We need to experience loss in order to appreciate gain. We need to live that in order to surpass it. I wouldn't have the compassion I have today if it weren't for my past, if it weren't for my struggles. To understand another in pain, I feel, at least in my life, it helps when we also endured such pain.

Yet getting back to these gentle fish- my love affair with those sweet loving clawed fish never went away. Later I was told they are called lobsters.

Today at Publix I passed by the same tank I always pass. I kiss them and say a prayer for them. Today when I looked in one of them looked back, bonding with me with the same love and it makes me now cry. It makes me cry to know their fate, and that its due to Human Choices.

Our surface is just content, it's temporary, it's perishable, but our love, our oneness, this bond, this profound connection is eternal.

May I see you dear fish in my dreams and in the stars.

Sometimes it's so sad what things we go through, its so sad and devastating how people just walk by without the need to stop, no looking with compassion or kindness in their eyes, just thoughts of me... and the next thing that needs to be done in an arrogant cry..

I cannot understand the lack of empathy, to such loving creatures that spark out divinity. Magestically they are wise, wise eyes, wise heart. They deserve as much love, as any dog or any cat alike. Also the pigs out there that can't even turn, they are stuck in factories full of poop, full of hatred, because they are manipulated by workers who are there to serve a purpose- to keep an industry that's made of violent acts, there is no consideration, or love or acts, of kindness or understanding- no sense of empathy, no altruism, just madness.

And the cows that are beautiful to hear- a loud moo moo and their tender ears that shoot straight up, when spoken to. I remember Sylvia the cow actually purr when I rubbed her pregnant tummy with all my love.. Such sweet embraces, I remember and do- appreciate all I have been through- to keep me in observance of what is truth. Love.

May we always catch our tendencies and return to the profound caring love that we are. I send all the creatures who suffer- all my love. Choose Love.

And everything that's not love eventually brings us back to LOVE EVEN MORE.

what a heavenly day.
each day is so blissful,
and even thought at times emotions are challenging or thoughts can take us here or there- usually there..
and everywhere but here, this divine moment where we are free to face the beingness within,
the oneness that's always available,
the kindness that's full of grace,
hugging us in a warm embrace,
a shining light, a feeling so warm,
so loving, so peaceful, so full
yet with such space,
ahh this bliss, on this day.

we all want to find happiness and we think if the other person wants us then we have a chance, but for so
e reason many people turn tp those incapable of loving others with the ongoing wish that they will please them and love them endessly. and it caves the poor broken hearted soul, that craves for love, outside, while all the while that love was there in the least odvious of places.. within.

within there's a power without words that can explain it really.
people search and search but when they stop the frustrating search and merely just observe they see its right there,
as if a sun was beaming inside them,
glorious and transparent,
iluminating all senses,
mind is quiet and surrendered.
body is calm, and even if there's physical pain, the aliveness within and throughout iis so much more grand, it makes everything else so inexisttent,
and without expectation, the light calms the surface, transmuting it into the love in which it came.
love,
everything thats not love eventually brings us back to love more and more.